Papa says she was born in the base hospital. But then, he actually wasn't there and is not able to attest to the "where" factor. Specifically, we all know the nurse sent him back to the office to wait it out while Granny was in labor, and that he dutifully returned to his accounting responsibilities until the fireworks ended. "Show me the baby," he said. And she did. That's all there was to "Husband-Coached Childbirth" way back then.
By contrast, some of the U.S. documentation of her birth states plainly that "a child was born to two American parents and was delivered at the U.S. embassy." Well, there is no embassy in Newfoundland, its in Ottawa, a bit of a distance to travel. This is beginning to sound like a coverup of some kind. Why would Granny be spirited away to Ottawa for childbirth without the knowledge of her husband? How was she able to return before he started asking questions? These are troubling issues.
To make matters worse, the birth certificate was actually issued by the Canadian Government in Gander, Newfoundland, a different direction from the base than Ottawa.
By contrast, some of the U.S. documentation of her birth states plainly that "a child was born to two American parents and was delivered at the U.S. embassy." Well, there is no embassy in Newfoundland, its in Ottawa, a bit of a distance to travel. This is beginning to sound like a coverup of some kind. Why would Granny be spirited away to Ottawa for childbirth without the knowledge of her husband? How was she able to return before he started asking questions? These are troubling issues.
To make matters worse, the birth certificate was actually issued by the Canadian Government in Gander, Newfoundland, a different direction from the base than Ottawa.
As a result of these confusing natal facts, and as you might expect, its no simple matter when someone asks her for her birth certificate. While I'm told that sometimes she can satisfy an inquiry by showing the “Gander paperwork,” if the requestor actually wants to see some proof of her U.S. Citizenship (which curiously, she chose on her eighteenth birthday when the issue was forced in the wake of the Watergate scandal and the Democrats taking a two thirds majority in the House), it doesn’t work.
Inquiring minds want to know: "where was this child born," but she clearly discloses that fact on a “need-to-know” basis. Do these matters reveal the real reason Transplant has moved to the far north, far away from Jerusalem-on-the-Brazos?
I just report the facts. You be the judge.
©2006 David R. Childress. All Rights Reserved
4 comments:
Let me enlighten you (and any readers who might be out there!) on the facts of the birth of "Goofy Newf."
I have, in fact, in front of me right now, a "Certificate of Birth" from the Province of Newfoundland, which is both signed and sealed, and is in fact an original from The Registrar of Vital Statistics. Department of Health, St. John's, Newfoundland. Nowhere on it does it say anything about Ottawa.
In addition to that, I have an original "Certificate of Citizenship" from the US Department of Justice. This was actually issued in 1962 and sports a picture of my 6 year old face, short crooked bangs, and side curls (I suspect I slept with bobby pins or pink rollers.) I think M&D got this certificate before we went to Morocco, in order to make my citizenship clear.
As if that were not enough, I also have the original Form FS-240, which is the "Report of Birth for a child born abroad of American parents." This is dated March of 1956 and signed by one Ross P.
oops, the end was cut off there....
signed by one Ross P. Titus, Vice Consul of the US
Is that Ross P. Titus, the double secret assistant to the security guard who "discovered" the break in after the burglars escaped?
And, now there is suddenly another "Certificate of Birth." Hmmm.
A 1962 DOJ certificate--how conveeeenient. I wonder. . .
A Form FS-240 reporting a birth in March '56 (so now there is another birthday?).
Do these things add up? Something is querky--
I still say come to Texas and clear this up. Come now. Come often. All will be forgiven.
I don't make these things up.
One more thought my dear, dear Transplant,
This "Ross P. Titus" is not all he appears to be.
Why, you may ask. Well, let met tell you.
First, I've read, in what appear to be reliable sources on the Internet, that often Sumo wrestlers will move to northern latitudes (such as Newfoundland) because the gravitational pull of the earth is weaker, and thus, they are 1) better able to comfortably support their weight during winter training; and 2) they actually weigh in at a lower amount and qualify for an easier class within which to wrestle (giving them an unfair advantage). (Stay with me now)
Pictures of this so-called "Ross P. Titus" that were available on the Internet until just yesterday (isn't that a coincidence), strongly suggest he was aka Hasha Tatamatsu (No I didn't just sneeze).
Everyone knows that Tatamatsu was a world famous double agent during the cold war, and especially the early sixties.
He worked using several different disguises, but most of the time, because of his heritage and size, he posed (with a little makeup and a Kimono over his wrestling garb) as a North or South Korean Sumo wrestler (I know the Koreans hate the Japanese, but it just shows you that sports can be a unifying force).
I hear tell at the end of he career, after his double agency had been exposed, he lived in the basement of the American Embassy in Canada (which as we all know is in Ottawa), and that he would sign anything put before him.
His most profitable venture involved forging birth certificates for those who entered Canada under questionable circumstances, say, circumstances with a connection to illegal Honky Tonks posing as flower shops (usually rose sellers by day, gin purveyors by night).
Makes you wonder doesn't it.
Why would Transplant have a document signed by Tatamatsu?
What connection does she have to the infamous "flower shop' by the base?
Why do birds fly south and pigs fly backwards?
Why did Brian Wilson put a sand box in his living room?
I'm just getting started, but I'm sure others have questions of their own.
If Transplant would just come to Texas, early and often, we could get to the bottom of all this.
Its true.
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